Talk talk talk...crash!

You know that feeling you get when you see someone doing something you used to do, but now you totally disagree with? Perhaps seeing someone wear leg-warmers...or hockey hair...you know what I'm talking about?

As a former addict, I can now proudly announce that I'm three weeks sober. Three whole weeks without using my cellphone while driving a motor vehicle. People I used to call are no longer subjected to wind noise, traffic noise, or the loud and frightening sound of me objecting vociferously to everyone else's driving techniques. No more "hang on, I have to shift," or "wait, a police car is going by." No more looking at the keypad to dial a number while who-knows-what is happening in front of my vehicle. No more surprise red lights!

Now granted, I don't drive very much. I do use my bike to get where I need to go. But those conversations were even worse. The high (or maybe low) point was me sealing a deal for a voice over job with a producer in Phoenix while riding three inches from speeding wahoos along Front Road. The guy on the other end had a thick Spanish accent...the guy on this end was yelling over traffic noise while trying to hammer out the details of the verbal contract, for a very important commercial.

I can't believe I was such a dink!

Now when I get a call from somebody who's obviously driving somewhere, my first thought is "wow, I'm so far down on your priority list that you only talk to me when you're driving somewhere." It's that same feeling you get when you're invited to a party, the day of, or getting one of those "participant" medals at a race.

The other side of this is that talking on a cellular telephone while driving is dumb. Ever drive with one of those people who need to make eye contact when they talk to you? Even when they're the one driving the car? I got behind a guy on Gardiner's the other day who was in a big conversation with his passenger. He spent more time looking and gesturing at the poor sap sitting next to him than he did looking out the big wide window in front of him (the one that shows the road ahead). His speed would go from 40k to 65k to 35k to 80 as he worked his way through the wonderfully entertaining story he must have been telling. Moron! Imagine if this knob had nobody next to him? He'd have to pull out his mobile phone and get into it with any fool who'd answer his call.

Yesterday, I almost got clipped by a lovely young woman in a blue Honda Civic. Either her eyes need a check up, or (more probably) she should maybe not be trying to dial a number, send a text or update her Facebook while driving...especially when she's in the middle of a turn through one of the busiest intersections in Kingston!

So if you get my "I can't get to the phone right now..." message from now on, it's all good. Leave me a detailed message, and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

Once it's in park, and the engine's off.